My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
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