I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Houston, we have a squirter
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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