At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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