We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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