he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Never underestimate the power of titties
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
