Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
