I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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