So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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