Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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