Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
