Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
