she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Randomize
