Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
