I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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