Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize