I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
