In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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