Pappa wants mamma naked
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
