We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
