can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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