My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
