If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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