Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
