nut hugger
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
