Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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