i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
