she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
