Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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