just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
dude. I can hear the air.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
