billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize