What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Randomize
