I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize