He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
