Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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