my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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