is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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