This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
