Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
