I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It's never too late to be topless.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
