It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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