Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
