I just made out with a guy for $7.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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