My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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