put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
