I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
God I need to hump something, right now.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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