I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
