I feel like abortions should bother me more
i think i have two assholes
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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