I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Less talking, more tequila
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
