The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
