16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Randomize