I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize